i literally cannot decide if this is negative propaganda or not lol
i literally cannot decide if this is negative propaganda or not lol
Okay, so about two years ago, I was a staggering 180-lb eighteen year-old girl (5ft6inches) who wanted to lose weight. I was entering my 4th Year in College and I did very well in losing pounds, I suppose. After nine months of dieting, an extreme lifestyle change, a couple of binge-eating, yoga and gym, I lost 60lbs and went down to my ideal goal weight. I was 120lbs and I felt better about myself. Mostly because I had more confidence, I kept myself busy, and my brain was functioning better than it had ever did before. I felt lighter, and I was indeed physically fit.
Then I entered internship. I got a little too busy with my hospital duties to drop by thew gym and follow my former diet. And I slowly started gaining weight, although still an acceptable bracket.
I gained about 3 pounds during my first two months in internship, and then gained another 9 pounds from my next hospital assignment (all because the patient load was super demanding! So I had to eat to help me with my physical fatigue. Then I realized I was at 132lbs, and when I transferred from San Juan de Dios after 2 months, I decided to start dieting again. I was at a pretty good pace and I started dieting and working out again because my next hospital wasn’t as physically demanding as my previous one. I was shedding 2 pounds per week and I was at 129lbs when I suddenly started talking to this guy who was also a Physical Therapist. He was a batch ahead of us, and he just finished taking his board exam. We were getting along pretty well, because like me, he was a former fatty. He was very nice and friendly, and we had a common interest which sparked tons of new topics for us to converse about. We both loved cooking, and working out. He was I think at 200+ pounds and was gradually shedding off the weight. We started dating a couple of weeks after talking to each other, which was when my diet started declining again.. and why wouldn’t it? We were going out every weekend. And our favorite thing to do was to look for restaurants. I remember our first date! Oh boy, it was at TGIF and I had a Fish Veracruz. Then we went to Jamba Juice. I drew the line at Jamba Juice and told him straight up that I can’t eat anything else anymore. He just laughed, and what happened next was an hour and a half of just talking to each other while walking around ATC. My main goal was basically to burn some calories by walking, while at the same time, getting to know him. Next date, a week afterwards, he fetched me from the hospital I was at duty in, and we ended up going to Rob Manila. We roamed around the mall for two hours before deciding to try Banana Leaf. Then we over-ate. He over-ordered by ordering a big plate of rice and three different dishes of Thai and Indonesian Food, forgetting that we were only two people, both on a diet. So he ended up getting majority of it for take out, and he had to gym the whole day the next day to burn off our food.
Date three was a week after that, and we went to Mall Of Asia. As usual, we walked around for a couple of hours before eating. i remember going to SeaSide with him and having our first actual serious talk about mundane things. I remember eating at Bulgogi Brothers and having our first picture together, too. Three days later, he took me out for an hour for lunch. He made me this unforgettably good beef lettuce wraps which I ended up finishing. Then a day afterwards, it was his 25th Birthday. I remember gymming and dieting extra hard that week so I can burn off calories. Because I knew that we were eating out on his birthday. September 29, 2013 was a truly memorable day. We met up at Mall of Asia, and I arrived there about an hour before the time we were supposed to meet up. I wanted to look for a gift, of course. That’s when I came across a cupcake stall. I decided to buy 8pcs of it for him, and I guess that was a sign of the following things to come. I met up with him at around 11am, and we walked around the mall before deciding to skip lunch (partly because Buffet 101 was closed already) and go get some coffee at Starbucks. That was the first time I had Green Tea Latte in 3 months. I decided that his birthday was my cheat day. We also ate some of the cupcakes I gave him. (Talk about calories and diabetes)
At around 5:30pm, we went back to Buffet 101 (it was finally open!) to get seated. I ate about three full plates of everything they had to offer, before realizing that I couldn’t eat anymore. I was done for the day.
A week after his birthday, at around Friday Night, we met up again. But this time, just roamed around Glorietta and had Japanese Food at Yoshinoya. I remember that night perfectly because it was the first night I let him accompany me home to Laguna. Key Word: Laguna; which mens the common tricycle terminal where I ride to go home. I didn’t let him take me all the way home. I don’t want a stranger seeing my house, of course. (LOL)
Exactly a day afterwards, we agreed to meet again. This time, at ATC. He said he had a surprise for me and asked me to dress up for the night. When I got to ATC, I thought we were just going to eat at a nice place and watch a movie. Apparently, he had a different thing in mind. We rode a cab from ATC and went to Vivere Hotel. I had my guard up at first, probably because he took me to a hotel for a date. (No matter how nice Vivere Hotel is, it’s still a hotel after all. Lol)
I remember that night perfectly as the people in Vivere attended to us. We were led to the highest floor of the hotel, where there was a beautiful restaurant. It was called The Nest. The place screamed elegance as it was a dimly lit restaurant with candles, live music and very nice waiters. But what took my breath away was something outsid. Outside of the restaurant was a view over-looking the whole Alabang. We had a table reserved outside and our three-course candlelight dinner was served to us by a very attentive waiter. After the dinner, we ordered a couple of drinks from the bar. I had a pink martini-like drink, while my man had beer. We were sitting close to each other, snuggling, when he asked me to be his girlfriend. I said yes.
what followed afterwards was eight months of nothing but pigging out and happiness which made me gain 40 pounds. Yes, my boyfriend stayed with me for eight months before going back to the States (he’s a FilAm) to fix his papers and take his NPTE (Which is on July 23). So, now I’m left with 40 pounds of relationship weight, a Long Distance Relationship with an amazing man, and tons of things to do because I have my Board Exam coming up on Feb 2015.
I am currently on my thid week of dieting and regular gym, and I am glad to say that I have lost at least 5 to 6 pounds already. I am still far from my goal weight of 125lbs, but I hope I get there eventually. Hopefully before February so I can fit and look good in my uniform (Exam takers are required to wear their PT Uniform at examination Day)
Wish me luck!
Oh, and Nathan? If you’re reading this..
THE BEST OF LUCK FOR YOUR NPTE ON THE 23rd!
I love you and I know you can do it!
I have to do my best to pass my Board Exam on Feb too! So we can finally take a 3-week well-deserved vacation together!
jesus is watching
Because I love torturing myself everyday about how much I miss you. You are nothing short of extraordinary and my heart will break each and every day I have to wake up knowing you won’t here beside me. #DayFour #HowLongDoesItTakeToGetUsedToThis 😔
I’ve been out of Tumblr for about nine months now before this post. I spent that whole nine months just being with my boyfriend. That, and my hospital duties. They were what kept me busy. Up to this day, I still firmly believe that those were the best nine month of my life.
Nate (my boyfriend) and I went everywhere together. We practically went all around Manila already; trying out different restaurants, eating different types of food (except for that Indonesian Restaurant in Makati that I never got to take him to. And El Chupakabra). It felt as if those days were never going to end. I was so happy. Being single for twenty years and being a product of a dedicated couple who only had me for a child, i finally had someone to be with. A life-long friend and lover. A companion.
Nate was the perfect companion. I’m not bragging, I swear. But for me, he was the epitome of a perfect companion. He got my jokes, and I got his. We both loved eating (we also used to be into gyming, but lol we got fat), and we bpth had no problem trying out different things. We balanced each other out. I was pessimistic, he was optimistic. I was kuripot, he was not. I am super lazy, the complete opposite of him. He was my voice of reason every time me and my folks had arguments. He was my new-found best friend. Whether it be a night filled with roses and a romantic dinner-for-two in The Nest, or a night at home with chips and some movies, we always had a good time.
If I could write a note to my old self, I’d just be telling her to calm down. I mean, I don’t know..
Sometimes, you meet a person who makes you understand everything that has happened to you. Every heartbreak, every relationship that never worked out, every prince charming who turned out to be a jerk, they all play a big part in preparing you for The Big One.
Someday someone unexpected just comes into your life and knocks you off your feet. And as you get to know that person, you realize that your life will never be the same. The same person will make you value yourself more.
Ever heard of the line “We accept the love we think we deserve”?
The Big One will make you see and accept the love he thinks you truly deserve. Something unconditional. Something you see in old people. A love filled with compromise, sacrifice, affection, a little passion, and a whole lot of companionship.
You meet this person, and you know you’ll never be alone again. Maybe in distance, but never at heart.
You’ll see effort like you’ve never seen before. You’ll see flowers, food, shirts he would never have worn if it wasn’t your favorite color..
You’ll see cheesy, you’ll see goofy, but most of all, you’ll see patience.
The patience that will make a person go to great lengths, for the person they love.
The patience that makes you wait in front of the hospital lobby for five hours.
The patience that makes you understand how a person feels.
It will be amazing. It will be great. It will be addictive.
It’s the type of love that makes people write letters, novels, poems, and songs.
When a man really loves you, it will be effortless. You won’t have to spend countless of sleepless nights just guessing around about his true feelings for you. A true man in love will make it pretty clear that he loves you.
You won’t have to nag everyday about not getting messages from him, because he will practically flood you with messages.
You won’t have to worry about your hideous beast acne, because he won’t make such a big deal out of it.
So many people look for love everyday. They play the part of a martyr. I was like that. But God loves each and every one of us, and it only takes one moment to meet someone. Someone who will change your life for good. Someone who will make you believe in yourself.
The Big One.